I know we would all like to think of ourselves as the innocent party in whatever situations confront us. But what if we aren't and we just refuse to see it?
The truth is that whatever we perceive is our reality. This is why some people live happy, calm, productive lives while others seem to drown in misery wherever they go. A certain piece of furniture might be totally harmless to one person while it inspires a trauma-related reaction to someone else. This is powerful knowledge to have.
One of the most productive and important things anyone can do for themselves is to become self-aware. If you're speaking to your loved ones in a way that's angry, using curse words, or just downright cruel, maybe it's time to pay attention to how you speak to them and change it when you catch yourself. Or even - God forbid - apologize to them. That would be the right thing to do.
My last point: if you can't even be honest with yourself, then how can you ever be honest with anyone else? It has to begin with you, because you can point the finger at anyone and everyone, but when it really comes down to it, how do you measure up - honestly - against your own standards?
Just some food for thought.